-Every Wedding Vendor Ever
BARF!
WHY??? Wedding people, why can’t you just put your prices on your website? How is a girl supposed to know if you are even in her ball park or not? Especially these days when the wedding design trends are “rustic” and “DIY inspired”. If the homepage for your catering company is a picture of a chalkboard with a list of drinks on it, that could mean either you are a small, reasonably priced mom and pop situation, OR an uber trendy, everything’s organic, you’re kidding yourself if you think you can afford this, $100 per person impossibility.
When I find a website for a local vendor, I have to go through the embarrassment of calling these places and them saying “Well what’s your budget?” and then upon me telling them a number, hearing the snickering on the other end of the line, the “Well we aren’t some sort of wedding factory,” the “Good luck with that in this town!” Hey wedding lady, you could have saved us both the trouble of that stupid convo if you would just put your stupid prices on your website!
So I guess their defense would be “Oh well that’s tacky” or “Every wedding is different” Well at least give me some sort of clue! A tiny hint at least that your prices are totally bonkers! Like, “Prices available upon request, but don’t bother calling if your family doesn’t own a yacht”, “We will create a custom package for you and by “custom” we mean around $20,000”, or “We will email you with pricing info- Wait, is your name Tricia McAlpin? Oh, this ain’t happenin.”
In these times of prevalent online deals for flights, for books, for shoes, for nearly everything under the sun, why do wedding vendors get to be so cryptic and mysterious about prices on their websites? How come it seems like they are competing to be the most expensive instead of the cheapest? Why can’t there be a Priceline negotiator for passed orderves?
BARF!
No! No! No! No! Nooooo! Say it ain’t so Martha! Encouraging women to trick their boyfriends into proposing? Those who know me know I LOVE me some Martha Stewart but after this post on her wedding blog today I may have to cancel my beloved subscription to Everyday Food.
Modern day women, can we all agree to stop pressuring our boyfriends to drop thousands of dollars on diamond rings if they aren’t financially or emotionally ready to do so? Is this how you got him to kiss you for the first time? Emailing him links to your favorite smooching scenes from The Notebook with the subject line “Hint hint”? Do you dupe him into buying you roses by secretly subscribing him to the 1800 Flowers catalog? Nothing like pulling one over on the man you love and forcing him to show you that he loves you WHETHER HE LIKES IT OR NOT DAMNIT!
Boo on you Martha Stewart Weddings for taking advantage of the non-engaged women lurking on your wedding website. At least steer them over to a fun craft project or a homemade pie crust. But for God’s sake, don’t encourage them to “accidentally” send pictures of engagement rings to their boyfriends! Gross!
Usually I make fun of wedding stuff on this blog, but Wu Tang weddings ain’t nuthin to fuck with.
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